On a personal note

Over the past few months Christian & I have really been evaluating our Financial situation. We have been thinking about different things, such as retirement and how we plan on spending our time here on earth. We don’t want to live for a mortgage and feel strapped and trying to do what God has called us to do. It seems through many conversations that we have there are a lot of people who are in the same frame of mind. It started with me thinking about our children. I started thinking what are we doing to teach our kids now about their financial future? I came quickly to the conclusion I am failing as a parent in this matter. I was teaching my kids the same way our parents taught us. The bible tells us to build up a inheritance for our kids, kids. I am sure that did not mean that we leave them with debt, and scrabbling at the end of their life to try to find a way to bury them. I know you are thinking I am sounding morbid right now,. “ hang on it will get better. ” I t means that we start as parents to show our selves responsible of how to handle finances. We teach our kids the importance of a work ethic, earning our livings, and tithing on what God has blessed us with. We teach self control on the urge to buy whatever comes our way. You know the keeping up with Jones mentality.

Do you believe in generational curses? I do.. The Bible Tell’s me so. I challenge you as a young adult, parent, senior what ever stage in life you are in. I want you to look back at your family and can you say

I am in much better shape then my parents or grand parents were. Are you planning on working until the day you die? Are you OK with being stressed over your financial situations? And have you even thought about your retirement a inheritance or legacy that you will leave behind. I promise you this “ nothing changes ,if nothings changes.

The other day Christian & I got up to a man being carried out of his house non responsive. He had passed through the night of a sudden heart attack.. I drive by his house at least 3 times a day. Each day this beautiful black car that he had sits out front of his home. I know this car had to be worth a lot of money, I am sure he had spent a a lot of money on it. Each day I drive by it is a reminder to me that he is gone, his soul is gone, but the black car still sits. How much are we spending on the things that we don’t take with us. How much of our money is wasted on the wrong things? I am not saying that if you can afford ,get it. I am saying are you being responsible with what you have? Do you have a retirement? Are you driving a car you can’t afford? Are you living in a house that you can’t afford? Are you living paycheck to paycheck because you are in debt? Have you contemplated suicide over the stress of money? Come on… Be honest!

What does the end of the day look like for you? As I get older, I am learning that I need to re evaluate my purpose here and what I plan on leaving behind for my kids. What lessons am I teaching, how I am doing by showing through example, and what is a QUALITY LIFE! I have to believe what God words says is true. He tells us that we should owe no man anything, he also tells us that we are not to be co signers on someone else debt. God talks more about money than he does on heaven. Why? I can tell you he knew it was the one thing that we would get ourselves in trouble with. I am a very proud American , we live in the land of the free. I don’t feel like that right now. I feel like we live in the land of debt and being held captive to the daily stress of keeping up. What are we going to do to change our circumstances? What are you going to change to see change?? Don’t wait for the government to see you through. God is our resource and he says a lot about it in the BIBLE. I challenge you to join me in making some worthy changes to see worthy results.

Boundaries

Boundaries The past few weeks we have been discussing Boundaries in G.A.N.G. It has been very interesting to hear the feed back from the ladies. We all have found areas in our life that we need serious help. We are learning that No is not a bad a word, it actually is a Boundary word. It’s not mean, it’s not unkind, and it’s simply not used enough. We have found that a lot of have become people pleasers and have been victims of being Yes men/women.

When we say Yes all the time we become miserable. You can often get tired, no down time, and living in complete chaos. We need to first learn what a boundary is.

 A boundary is an emotional and physical space between you and another person. A boundary is drawing a line over which you will not allow anyone to cross because of the negative impact of its being crossed in the past. A boundary is defining limits within which you are free to be yourself with no restrictions placed on you by others as to how you should think, feel or act.

 The Bible tells us in 1 cor 10:23 “Everything is permissible”- but not everything is beneficial. “Everything is permissible”- but not everything is constructive. The more we are grounded in who we are first with God, the more confidence we have to set healthy boundaries. God wants us to be kind, love our neighbor, but he never wanted us to be a YES men.

 If you don’t learn boundaries how will anyone ever know your limits? Physical or emotional. Setting boundaries may not always be comfortable. But you need to be honest with yourself, and to God. People will not like your boundary setting at first; however they will come to respect it.

 In our home we have 5 daughters. So as you can imagine the amount of blow dryers, flat irons, and curling irons we have going. Well since I have the largest bathroom, with the biggest mirror, the girls love to get ready in there. They leave my bathroom all prettied up, however not all Cleaned up. So, I decided to practice my teaching with setting a boundary in my own home. No longer are the girls able to get ready in my bathroom. Yeah, yippee I did it!!! I have my bathroom all to my self, to light candles, take a bath, and get ready with out 5 other girls in there. I am finally the Queen B in the bathroom. The girls asked every day for about a week. Can I please get ready in there? Mommy, can I take a bath in there? Mommy can I? No, No, and more No’s all week. I set a boundary with them. They did not like at first, but they have stopped asking.

 I am interested to here the feed back from these teachings and see what has happened over the past few weeks with boundary setting. I look forward to hearing some success stories.

Pro 11:2 when pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.

The G.A.N.G talked this morning about humility. This is one that I know I struggle with often. I want to do things with a genuine heart, but often times I still look for the approval from people. So I have to ask my self the question. Did I do this unto the Lord, or just because it was in my heart? Or, did I do it so others would notice me? Why does it feel so good for us to hear from others that you did a great job, or WOW that was amazing? Why can’t it just be that we did it because it was laid on our heart to do it?

Humility is doing things without anyone else noticing, or seeking the approval of someone else. It can also be taking a low road. It is putting pride aside. Humility is not weakness; it is the epitome of strength. Humility moves a person away from human, personal weakness and limitation into divine expression, strength, and expansion.  In this mornings meeting we talked about the different ways to be humble.  We discussed the people who serve behind the scenes all the time. I told how we have people who are the mechanics of the church that no one will ever see. Tracey spoke of the ladies at the Awaken conference. The ladies who made sure we all had something to drink or that the gifts were prepared to hand out. The people that never were told good job, or great speech. These are the people that will surely be first in the Kingdom. True Humility means being confident in whom you are and what you accomplish but always being mindful that your gifts and talents are given by God. It is okay to have confidence in yourself while having a humble posture.

We were reminded today by Judee the very act of humility from JESUS. He actually washed the feet of man to show us what it truly means to be humble before someone. Have you ever washed someone else’s feet for no reason? Only to do it out of an act of humility. Try it! JESUS did.

Truth or Scare

I was so excited to part of the Awaken conference this past weekend. I was very honored to be chosen to speak in a break out. Choosing a topic was the most difficult. I knew I wanted to speak of Strength, but never knew that God would put it on my heart to share such a personal story. 

I started the breakout with reading a page from my diary. It was a night that was sleepless. I wrote that it was 3:33am. I had to do a countdown to help get myself calm again. I read on later that day and realized I wrote that page when I was 27 years old.  I hate to admit that was 10 years ago. Glad to report though my panic has not been like that in 10 years. Praise God! I continued the breakout with reading Philippians 4:13. His scripture reminds us of that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.  That was a tough one for me to believe. My fear was always much greater than my faith. I was always more inclined to believe the negative and the lies way before I was ready to give the matter to GOD. Every day was filled with heart palpitations, sweaty palms, heavy breathing, and headaches. It was exhausting just to get through the day. I had even entertained the thought that I could not go another day like this. 

I finally after several different tries of different therapies came to the heart breaking conclusion that this would not go away by itself. I had to make a decision. I was either going to medicate myself to the point of numbness or I was going to have to CONFRONT my fears. One by one, and day by day. There was nothing easy about this. Actually, the challenge seemed overwhelming at the time. I knew that the constant fear was robbing me of all the joy in my life. This was not the life that God had called me to live. I was missing opportunities to advance my career. I was limiting myself to things that would have been fun for me to experience. And I was putting a limit on how I would let God use me. I struggle with trust tremendously, and the ultimate fear of losing control. 

I have learned over the years that my fear of flying, dying and trusting had to do with ONE general fear. The fear of not having CONTROL! Whew, that was a hard pill to swallow. Mind over Matter is what I had to learn. We have to be so careful of our thought life. The Bible tells us in Job3:25 For the thing which I greatly feared is come upon me, and that which I was afraid of is come unto me. That means that whatever we meditate on is what we make part of us.

Do these things you fear afraid. That means flying, driving over a bridge, confronting people. Going to places, and taking a new opportunity. Don’t be held hostage by fear. I gave the enemy 10 years of my life. I am still prone to anxiety, panic and an overwhelming feeling of fear. I am not comfortable with confronting my fears. However the only other option is to allow it to control me. That is no longer an option any more for me.

If you are reading this blog and you struggle with Panic, anxiety, or fear. I am telling you that you can & will have VICTORY! It will not be easy, however all thing are possible through Christ. Draw your strength from Christ and I promise you it will make the difference between succeeding and failing. 

The best way for us to upgrade our mind is to download scripture!